| Dear Dr. Colt: Like many in our country club, | | | | relationship? "Keeping up with the Jones's" can |
| we've enjoyed the recent prosperous years, | | | | burn out a family. Success and hard work are |
| buying things we never dreamed we could. The | | | | admirable, but modern day idolatry in craving the |
| problem is my husband's reaction to the economic | | | | latest Lexus over domestic tranquility is toxic. |
| recession. Before, he was merely stressed | | | | 2) Teamwork. A strong, equitable partnership in |
| trying to capitalize on the robust business climate, | | | | marriage is essential to present and future |
| his mind always on being as successful as our | | | | success. Facing bad times as a team, as well as |
| friends. We began drifting apart, but now it's | | | | enjoying the good, is fundamental. Discuss |
| much worse. We rarely make love and he's | | | | together what your family's goals are, including |
| become hypercritical of me, treating me like a | | | | those personal and financial. Create a |
| child, often exploding about nothing. I feel our | | | | mutually-devised plan that fairly balances each |
| love evaporating. What can I do? -- Stressed | | | | person's needs and desires. |
| in San Diego | | | | 3) Stress. Even being "merely stressed" takes |
| Dear Stressed in San Diego: Assuming no other | | | | an insidious toll. Stress can be a risk factor for |
| issues (though there often are), "the problem" has | | | | early heart disease and immune system |
| at least three facets requiring immediate attention: | | | | suppression. It increases adrenal glands activation |
| 1) Balance. Your current priorities are not serving | | | | and cortisol secretion, decreasing memory and |
| you well. What's more important to you and | | | | learning skills. Exercise and other stress reduction |
| your husband: "buying things" or an intimate, close | | | | tools you can learn help protect against it. |